Chapped Ground

Still away on vaca..... and lovely it is! But busy and very much on the move, so I am a tired B, friends.

I've managed to read  my three prayers for Advent this morning before hitting the road. The one I'd like to share with you today is titled The Divine Will and is from Section I: Father, Son, and Holy Spirit in the Valley of Vision.

The next to last stanza is worth committing to memory, I think:

"Teach me to believe that all degrees of mercy arise
from several degrees of prayer,
that when faith is begun it is imperfect and must grow,
as chapped ground opens wider and wider until rain comes."

As the prayer says, I'm asking the Lord to help me

• to honor Him by believing before I feel, for great is the sin if I make feeling a cause of faith
• and to strengthen me to pray with the conviction that whatever I receive is His gift

Oh, how I do sometimes often depend on my sin-filled "feelings" to determine whether I should believe in the Lord rather than on the truth of His Word!

And doubt what I receive from His Hand to be a gift? Every day.... every day, I do. You would think as I get older and look back at the "hard" things He has placed in my life and then see the blessings that come from it that I would be quicker to understand that all He gives me is a gift. And trust that this next new "hard" thing will carry blessings with it as I am obedient to whatever it brings.

Maybe I am learning just a bit, but my first instinct is still to doubt.  

May your imperfect faith grow and your chapped ground be filled with His living water, bloggy friends.

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Valley of Vision - Advent Readings

A friend and I are going to read prayers from the Valley of Vision this Advent Season. We started yesterday and are using this schedule (see link at bottom of article). While neither of us think we'll be able to stop and read the prayers at the times specified each day, we plan to read all three assigned prayers daily. For me, with my current schedule and life, that means figuring out the best time of day. We are traveling this week (more on that later!) so there's an even bigger challenge with starting something like this while on the road. 

The very first prayer (Self-Knowledge from Section III: Penitence and Deprecation) gave me much to chew on - nothing less than my sinful self! From the prayer, here is a list of my "needs" - 

My lack of:

1. Scriptural knowledge to know God's will 
2. Wisdom to guide others
3. Spirit of prayer (i.e. words without love - ouch!)
4. Daily repentance (without which I keep God at bay)
5. Joy in God and His will 
6. Zeal for God's glory (seeking my own instead!)
7. Love to others

Pretty complete list, I think. And as the prayer says - I'm asking God to give me the grace to recall my needs....

"And let me not lay my pipe too short of the fountain,

never touching the eternal spring,

never drawing down water from above."

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Book Review: A Praying Life

A Praying Life: Connecting with God in a Distracting World by Paul E. Miller, Paperback: 288 pages, Publisher: NavPress (May 15, 2009), ISBN-10: 1600063004

Source: Recommended by LC
Rating: 5 of 5 STARS

Ok, one load of laundry done and another on its way, so I have time for another review! :-) This is one of my favorite ways to spend a Saturday: chore, write, chore, read, chore, draw, and then start all over again!

I read this book at the beach and my copy is all sodden and swollen. It smells of the sea, which makes me happy today. A Praying Life is a wonderfully engaging book with the author's personal life struggles interwoven into the theology of prayer. Practical, real-world, and humble, Paul E. Miller is someone worth reading. The best way for you to get an idea of what the book is about is to look at the section titles:

Learning to Pray Like a Child, Learning to Trust Again, Learning to Ask Your Father, Living in Your Father's Story, and Praying in Real Life.

Bottom line, it's hard to pray. And Miller acknowledges that from the beginning and gives great advice and encouragement on how to deepen (or in some cases even begin) your prayer life. I personally drift in and out of the safe harbor of a meaningful prayer life. I don't know why I let my sails get caught so often in crosswinds that carry me away, but this book helped me batten things down a little better.

From the Introduction: I never started out to write a book on prayer. I simply discovered that I'd learned how to pray. Life's unexpected turns had created a path in my heart to God; God taught me to pray through suffering. (page 11)

Miller takes us through learning to be helpless, dealing with our cynicism, figuring out what it is that we won't ask for and why, and then finding our place in God's overarching redemption story. It's not until the very last section of the book that Miller gives readers some very useful and practical tools for the daily praying life. No, what he's really promoting is more than just a daily praying life, it's a continuous minute-by-minute praying life.

This book is well worth the time to read. I would read it slowly, though. It's not a book to be gulped, but one to be sipped, slowly and thoughtfully.

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A Litany of Penitence

Ah, bloggy friends. I was cleaning out my draft posts that never got published and found this from February, 2009. Why didn't I ever post it? I don't know, but I am humbled to have found it today... and to reread it today.... and to repent today. I think this will be a daily prayer of mine for a good long while. Blessings to you and yours ~

From the Book of Common Prayer:

Most holy and merciful Father:
We confess to you and to one another,
and to the whole communion of saints
in heaven and on earth,
that we have sinned by our own fault
in thought, word, and deed;
by what we have done, and by what we have left undone.

We have not loved you with our whole heart, and mind, and strength.
We have not loved our neighbors as ourselves.
We have not forgiven others, as we have been forgiven.
Have mercy on us, Lord.

We have been deaf to your call to serve, as Christ served us.
We have not been true to the mind of Christ.
We have grieved your Holy Spirit.
Have mercy on us, Lord.

We confess to you, Lord, all our past unfaithfulness:
the pride, hypocrisy, and impatience of our lives,
We confess to you, Lord.

Our self-indulgent appetites and ways, and our exploitation of other people,
We confess to you, Lord.

Our anger at our own frustration, and our envy of those more fortunate than ourselves,
We confess to you, Lord.

Our intemperate love of worldly goods and comforts, and our dishonesty in daily life and work,
We confess to you, Lord.

Our negligence in prayer and worship, and our failure to commend the faith that is in us,
We confess to you, Lord.

Accept our repentance, Lord, for the wrongs we have done:
for our blindness to human need and suffering, and our indifference to injustice and cruelty,
Accept our repentance, Lord.

For all false judgments, for uncharitable thoughts toward our neighbors,
and for our prejudice and contempt toward those who differ from us,
Accept our repentance, Lord.

For our waste and pollution of your creation,
and our lack of concern for those who come after us,
Accept our repentance, Lord.

Restore us, good Lord, and let your anger depart from us;
Favorably hear us, for your mercy is great.
Accomplish in us the work of your salvation,
That we may show forth your glory in the world.
By the cross and passion of your Son our Lord,
Bring us with all your saints to the joy of his resurrection.

Almighty God have mercy on us,
forgive us all our sins through our Lord Jesus Christ,
strengthen us in all goodness,
and by the power of the Holy Spirit keep us in eternal life.
Amen.

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Flower Wheels

I spent most of the Sabbath day either reading or doodling these flowers. (Ok - I'll admit it. OR eating chocolate!) I sat at my little round table by the fire with two puppies snoring in their beds at my feet and doodled to my heart's content. And a lot of that time I was praying even as kids and hubby were coming in and out, chatting here and there.

As I look at the drawing today I can remember who or what I was talking to God about as I drew.... The flower with the wood grain center was for Sean and The Girl M....The lacy looking flower was for E...The circle with the hatching was for Mary... I prayed for friends, for our jobs, for our church, for the New Year. And then I was quiet and just listened for God's voice. It is so funny to me that I feel closer to God, can talk more easily to Him, when I draw. My mind finds it so easy to drift away when I'm sitting in my chair early in the morning trying to pray. Drawing while I'm praying seems to somehow tether it down.

Blessings, bloggy friends -

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Prayer & Community

Happy Sabbath Day, bloggy friends. I've started a new book for morning devotions, Learning to Pray Through the Psalms by James W. Sire. This morning's chapter was on Psalm 32. Here's a quote Sire took from Eugene Peterson that I wanted to share:

The assumption that prayer is what we do when we are alone - the solitary soul before God - is an egregious, and distressingly persistent, error. We imagine a lonely shepherd on the hills composing lyrics to the glory of God. We imagine a beleaguered soul sinking in a swamp of trouble calling for help. But our imaginations betray us. We are a part of something before we are anything, and never more so than when we pray. Prayer begins in community.

Sire goes on to say:

This does not mean that we should not pray alone. Jesus himself often went off by himself, away from his disciples, and prayed. But it does mean that all of our private, lonely prayers are to be seen as linked with those of our community. Even alone we are communal, and never more so than when we are praying the psalms, for then we are joining the community of an ancient king who himself was a member of the community of the King.

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Tree Tops

As I said on Sunday, I'm inspired by the prints of Bernadette Sipkes. Taking several of her drawings on Etsy (but mainly the one above) I put my own twist to it and came up with the one below. Then I scanned it in and Photoshopped to make a blue version. I'm not perfectly happy with these by any stretch, but I'm glad to have been inspired to draw a bit again. It's been awhile - since July, I think. Looking back at my calendar, looks like I stopped when I found out a good friend was sick. Hmm...

I drew early this morning (five-ish) with coffee cup in hand and, though I was intent on mimicking Sipkes work, the tree "leaves" were relaxing to do and I found myself praying for different family members and friends on each one.

It still seems that the act of drawing does something to my mind... It's like it ties up the part of my brain that tends to roam around which then allows me to take the rest of it and focus on other things, like praying.

Hope you have a "Tree Top" day, bloggy friends!

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Pondering This Morning...

(Lebanese Christians mark territory in East Beirut)

What does the first request mean?

Hallowed be thy name means
Help us to really know you,
to bless, worship and praise you
for all your works
and for all that shines forth from them:
your almighty power, wisdom, kindness,
justice, mercy, and truth.

Heidelberg Catechism, Q&A 122

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Bruised Spices

C. H. Spurgeon on prayer:

"Possibly you have sometimes said, "I feel so sorrowful that I cannot pray." No, Brother, that is the very time when you must pray. As the spices, when bruised, give forth all the more fragrance because of the bruising, so let the sorrow of your spirit cause it to send forth the more fervent prayer to the God who is both able and willing to deliver you! You must express your sorrow in one way or another, so let it not be expressed in murmuring, but in supplication! It is a vile temptation, on the part of Satan, to keep you away from the Mercy Seat when you have most need to go there - but do not yield to that temptation!"

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Books, Icons, & Prayer

After finishing The Jesus Way, I've started another book on my Christian Non-Fiction TBR List: Reading is Believing: The Christian Faith through Literature and Film by David S. Cunningham. Very interesting so far. The first chapter used Iris Murdoch's novel The Time of the Angels as a discussion point for the first phrase of the Apostle's Creed: "I believe in God, the Father almighty, Creator of Heaven and Earth" It wasn't so much that Murdoch's novel was an example of characters who believed in God but rather those who didn't.

Cunningham mentions that The Time of the Angels "offers, in a very subtle way, a point of severe contrast to the various self-serving relationships to God among its various characters. Its subtlety is due to the fact that this alternative is offered not through human character at all, but rather an icon."

He then goes on to discuss Rublev's icon of the Trinity and how Murdoch uses it throughout her novel, allowing it to touch the life of each character, who then sometimes carelessly set it aside and sometimes eagerly seek it out (but for their own purposes.) Of course, this piqued my interest in the icon, so a-Googling I went.

Above is a painting based on the icon. Russian artist Andrei Rublev painted it in 1410 as a representation of Genesis 18:1-15 when Abraham was visited by the three angels at the oak of Mamre but the painting is full of symbolism and is often interpreted as an icon of the Holy Trinity. It now resides in a museum in Moscow.

Here's a short blurb from Henri Nouwen about the image:

"Andrew Rublev painted this icon not only to share the fruits of his own meditation on the mystery of the Holy Trinity but also to offer his fellow monks a way to keep their hearts centered in God while living in the midst of political unrest. The more we look at this holy image with the eyes of faith, the more we come to realize that it is painted not as a lovely decoration for a convent church, nor as a helpful explanation of a difficult doctrine, but as a holy place to enter and stay within. As we place ourselves in front of the icon in prayer, we come to experience a gentle invitation to participate in the intimate conversation that is taking place among the three divine angels and to join them around the table. The movement from the Father toward the Son and the movement of both Son and Spirit toward the Father become a movement in which the one who prays is lifted up and held secure...

Through the contemplation of this icon we come to see with our inner eyes that all engagements in this world can bear fruit only when they take place within this divine circle. The words of the psalm, "The sparrow has found its home at last. . . . Happy are those who live in your house" (Ps 84: 3,4) are given new depth and new breadth; they become words revealing the possibility of being in the world without being of it. We can be involved in struggles for justice and in actions for peace. We can be part of the ambiguities of family and community life. We can study, teach, write and hold a regular job. We can do all of this without ever having to leave the house of love. . . . Rublev's icon gives us a glimpse of the house of perfect love." - from Behold the Beauty of the Lord: Praying with Icons

I've read a little about the practice of praying with icons, but haven't really thought much about it. Here's a link to a short explanation of icons from a Protestant point of view. Also, for more information on the symbols in Rublev's icon of the Trinity, take this very well-done virtual tour.

Thought provoking. Blessings to you today, bloggy friends!

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My House Shall Be Called a House of Prayer

Last night we went to small group and our worship leader shared a short video about prayer by Jim Cymbala of the Brooklyn Tabernacle Church. It was a very intriguing discussion and in the video, Mr. Cymbala referred to a sermon he preached in 1994 in Indianapolis at a conference called 'My House Shall Be Called a House of Prayer.' I found it this morning and listened to it. It's almost an hour long, but I encourage you to find some time this week to view it. It's a powerful message and one I needed to hear today.

Genesis 4:26b
At that time men began to call on the name of the LORD.

Matthew 21:12-13
Jesus entered the temple area and drove out all who were buying and selling there. He overturned the tables of the money changers and the benches of those selling doves. "It is written," he said to them, " 'My house will be called a house of prayer,' but you are making it a 'den of robbers.'"

Acts 9:10-12
Now there was a disciple at Damascus named Ananias. The Lord said to him in a vision, "Ananias." And he said, "Here I am, Lord." And the Lord said to him, "Rise and go to the street called Straight, and at the house of Judas look for a man of Tarsus named Saul, for behold, he is praying, and he has seen in a vision a man named Ananias come in and lay his hands on him so that he might regain his sight."

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Waking Up to God's Presence

"The psalmist realized life as he lived it and was able to celebrate it in thanksgiving and praise. How much more breathtaking our lives could be if we were deeply aware of the gifts of God that surround us and engage us. If we were awake!

Prayer is one way to recognition. "Persevere in prayer, with mind awake and thankful heart" (Col. 4:2, NEB). In meditation we can wake up to God's presence. In silence we can be aware of our intimacy with God. In solitude we can know our life is connected with Christ, and with other people. In prayer we can open our heart, be receptive, make space for God, and begin to give thanks." - Don Postema in Space for God

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Doodles

More doodling and more prayer...

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Two More Doodles

I can't tell you how much doing these little doodles calms my soul. I can be upset, my mind racing a mile a minute, and if I start drawing, things seem to settle down almost with an audible 'click'. Not all of the time I spent doing these were also spent praying, but at least some of the time was. My mind can so much easier focus on the people and things I'm praying about when I'm doodling.

Top drawing: Identi-Pen (fine/extra fine), Staedtler pigment liner (0.7), Micron pen (01).
Bottom drawing: same as above and added pencil shading.

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Doodling & Praying

Another Zendala...praying and doodling...doodling and praying...

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Praying with Art: Zendala

A couple of weeks ago I posted about zendalas and my prayer doodles. Here's my first prayer-zendala I completed yesterday...a good way to spend a Sabbath evening. Lots of people on my heart.

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Praying with Art

About a year and a half ago, I randomly picked up a book called Praying in Color and it got me started down a path of praying while basically....er....doodling. I found it to be a great way to keep my mind focused on whatever or whoever I was praying for. Now I find myself pretty much doodling all the time now, even when I'm in a training session for work. It helps my mind not wander and I find that I can better focus on what the speaker is saying if I'm drawing.

I came across this post at Ms. Julie's Place through Semicolon. I was amazed...A kindred doodling spirit...And all these things called zendalas... I'm going to have to give them a try. Here's the video on how to draw them from You-Tube:

Also, here's one of my bizarre praying doodles. I probably worked on this for a couple of weeks. Ellen says if you look closely, some of the faces and little animals are a bit scary. I think she's right.

Also, note Elvis in the bottom left corner! :-)

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Praying in Color - The Ten Commandments

A few weeks ago I posted a meditation on the Ten Commandments that I found at A Ten O'Clock Scholar. Since then, I've been using this meditation to do a "Color Prayer" based on the book Praying in Color. I've found this to be a great way to focus my mind and turn off all the extra noise in the morning while I'm trying to pray.

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Ash Wednesday Prayer

Faithful God, trusting in you

we begin the forty days of conversion and penance.

Give us the strength for Christian discipline,

that we may renounce evil

and be decisive in doing good.

We ask this through Jesus Christ.

Amen.

(Henri Nouwen)

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