Greetings from sunny Florida! I flew down to Tampa yesterday for a work meeting and will be here until Friday. It’s been good to see glimpses of the Gulf and palm trees, to ride over the Sky Bridge and see people fishing off its side piers, and to watch ospreys gliding over the water. I don’t think I’ll have much time to explore, but it seems like a nice place to visit.
We flew Southwest Airlines which has always been a good experience for me. But yesterday in Raleigh our flight was delayed two hours because bad weather in another part of the country slowed down Southwest’s whole system. As we were approaching Tampa, the pilot came over the PA system and asked us to forgive Southwest for the delays we experienced and please come back to fly with them again.
I thought the pilot’s use of the word ‘forgive’ in this context interesting and it made me consider forgiveness in general as we began our rather bumpy descent. I suppose when we forgive anybody – an airline, a co-worker, a friend, a spouse – there is often a sort of coming back to them involved. I guess it doesn’t have to be this way to forgive, but the best act of forgiving has this component to it.
When I forgive a friend for whatever wrong she has done to me, really forgive, I come back to her with my heart, prepared to lay it on the line again, prepared to be vulnerable and open and ready to trust her. (Now, I know sometimes it’s reasonable to truly forgive someone and not come back. There are times when you can forgive the wrong, but it’s just not possible, or always even healthy, to allow the person the same kind of access to your heart again. I think of the adult child who wants to forgive the parent who was abusive to them or the woman who needs to forgive the man who molested her. Forgiveness is important, critical to the both the child’s and woman’s mental and emotional health, but complete restoration of the relationships are probably not going to happen this side of Heaven.)
I think “Come-Back-Forgiveness” is what the Jesus is talking to Peter about in Matthew 18 when He says don’t just forgive someone seven times then cut them out of your life. Forgive them seventy times seven! Basically, forgive them over and over again. Give them Come-Back-Forgiveness.
This is the kind of forgiveness God gives us. We sin against Him myriad times a day and yet He doesn’t leave us. He’s patient and gentle, pouring out new mercies each morning, giving us balm for our souls when we deserve so much less. Over and over again, He forgives not just when we don’t obey His commands, but also when we ignore Him and choose more “hip” friends, when we fail to speak up for Him when we hear others putting Him down, and when we get too busy to spend time with Him really talking and listening to what He has to say. But He’s always there, offering forgiveness and putting His heart out to us again and again.
Paul told the Ephesians “Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.” (Ephesians 4:32) God models this amazing, and expensive, type of forgiveness for us every day. There’s always a price to be paid for forgiveness. Not by the person who is being forgiven, but by the person who is doing the forgiving. And it’s never cheap. When we forgive, we absorb the pain caused by the sin against us into ourselves. It doesn’t just disappear. When God forgave us, He did the same thing. He absorbed the pain of our sins by sending His Son to die on the Cross.
I’m praying today to be able to show others in my life Come-Back-Forgiveness. But more importantly, I’m praying to be able to more clearly understand how God has forgiven me, how He continues to forgive me, and how He will keep on forgiving me everyday I have left here on this earth.
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